I look at this picture of you and your first born son and I feel such pride and joy for you. My heart swells with love, here is my little boy all grown up holding his little boy just fresh from heaven. I knew then as I know now, you are and will always be a wonderful father to your children. I know that I wasn't there for you like a good mother should be, but you have done so well for yourself without me. And I'm proud of you for that. I wish sometimes that I could turn back time and make things different and be the mother I should have been for you, but you know, if I could do that. things would be different for you now, you may not have met your wonderful wife Sara or have your two beautiful children Ben and Elizabeth. As hard as life has been for all of us, I believe it was meant to be this way, so that we could get to where we are now in our lives. Especially you.
I know you suffered the most because of me and my mental illness because you were older. I am eternally sorry for the burdens that I had thrust upon you, I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me or for not letting you be a kid. I am glad that you found a loving family that gave you what I could not. But I'm here now, and I want to be here for you as much as I can for you and your beautiful family. I am so proud of you and what you have done with your life and all that you have achieved. Your wife and children are so lucky to have you and I'm so lucky to have you as my son. I love you Philip. Love, Mum
